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Verbs 'Conjugate' at the Gym Jul. 26, 2023
In today's episode, Hulk Hogan takes his grandnephew Winky on a tour of the Verb Gym... Hulk: Look! ... Read More
Having Skin in the Game Jul. 25, 2023
Dear Company That Makes All My Skincare Products: I'm writing to tell you that I am a BIG fan of you... Read More
Singing a Different Tune Jul. 18, 2023
I'm a relatively quiet sleeper. I don't talk in my sleep. I don't snore in my sleep... much. I don't... Read More
Superstitions May Be Silly, but That Doesn't Mean They're Bad Jul. 15, 2023
The other day, my son asked me why the number 13 is unlucky. I usually take his questions seriously... Read More
It's Not Easy Being Green Jul. 11, 2023
My husband has never been a coffee drinker. He'll go for an extremely sweetened cappuccino every now... Read More
The Wild, Weird History of Pets in My House Jul. 08, 2023
This Fourth of July, social media was abuzz with fireworks complaints — not due to parents bem... Read More
I've Exited Lactation Station. Now Please Tell My Doctors Jul. 01, 2023
I am not breastfeeding. I feel compelled to share that information because many people continue to l... Read More
Playing Fowl Jun. 27, 2023
When you buy a new house, you're not just getting the house; you are also getting someone else's tas... Read More
What Have We Lost in the Exchange for Our Children's Safety? Jun. 24, 2023
I got a haircut recently, and as the stylist snipped, she asked a question. Her ex-husband had prote... Read More
Summer Reading List 2023: Books for When You Can't Focus Jun. 24, 2023
It's the briny armpit of another June. The presidential race already reeks like an abandoned diaper.... Read More
I'm Shocked, Shocked to Find These Errors! Jun. 21, 2023
No experience is more delicious than catching someone in an act of hypocrisy. And that goes double w... Read More
Confessions of a Toilet Paper Hoarder Jun. 20, 2023
"Mom, why do you have 36 rolls of toilet paper, 12 bars of soap, eight tubes of toothpaste and six j... Read More
A Guide to Storing Your Most Sensitive Documents Jun. 17, 2023
At times, we must all take stock of bad habits and try to reform them. Eating too much sugar. Interr... Read More
Seeing Spots Jun. 13, 2023
"What do you think this is?" my husband asked me, pointing to his elbow. "That's your elbow," I stat... Read More
Passive-Aggressive Alerts from My Apple Watch in Times of Stress Jun. 10, 2023
I am your Apple Watch! You have opted to spend hundreds of dollars for the privilege to wear me not ... Read More
Breaking Bad Jun. 06, 2023
I heard the smash way before I saw the victim of the smashing. "What was that?" I yelled into the ki... Read More
Pronoun Choice Can Lead to Double Bogey May. 31, 2023
Which sentence is correct? "My husband likes golf more than I," or "My husband likes golf more than ... Read More
Smoking's Long, Slow Slide Into Oblivion May. 27, 2023
It's become common at the start of movies and TV shows to show a list of all the various ways the co... Read More
Ron DeSantis, Torturer and Future President May. 26, 2023
Hello. I'm Ron DeSantis and I approve of the following message. As you may have heard, I'm running f... Read More
Breaking the Bank May. 23, 2023
I'd always had a good relationship with my bank machine. I gave it checks; it gave me money; it seem... Read More
