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Women Know It Ain't Over When It's Over

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It seems a growing number of Americans are hoping the yearlong vitriol aimed at strong women will evaporate right along with the presidential candidacy of Hillary Clinton.

"Whew," the collective sigh will sound. "Glad that's over."

Don't pop the corks just yet.

Last week, I was invited to celebrate the opening of the new Women's Center at Ohio University. About a hundred people, mostly female students, gathered for me to say a few words and then for them to share what's on their minds.

The young women didn't waste any time on happy-face pretenses, as one after another stood and asked questions.

"How can you be a strong woman and not have others call you a bitch?"

"How do you keep going when others ridicule you?"

"Can you really be a strong woman and still have men like you?"

One woman stood up and, in a halted voice, managed one sentence before the tears started to fall: "Someone gave me a Hillary nutcracker as a gift."

The room fell silent. A friend grabbed her hand, and several older women in the audience started wiping their eyes.

"I can see that felt personal and that it hurt you," I said slowly. She nodded, her eyes never leaving mine.

I looked out at that room full of young women and felt the stomach-clenching certainty that these were no ordinary storm clouds swirling overhead. We have only begun to feel the damage of the punch-and-pummel pundits who couldn't wrap their limited minds around the first woman to win a presidential primary, again and again.

The questions didn't surprise the center's director, Susanne Dietzel.

"I was just glad that they felt they could speak honestly," she said. "We need a space to do this because it has become mainstream to be sexist. The message has become, 'You don't want to be seen as Hillary.'"

For several weeks now, I've been getting e-mails that link to a YouTube video titled "Hillary Clinton: Mad as Hell." It's about nine minutes long, and it should be required viewing for anyone who claims that gender has not played a role in the attacks against Clinton.

Consider these snippets from male pundits:

CNN's Glenn Beck declares, "Big news from New Hampshire tonight is: It cries! After spending decades stripping away all trace of emotion, femininity and humanity, Hillary Clinton actually broke down and actually cried."

MSNBC's Mike Barnicle says that Clinton looks "like everyone's first wife standing outside a probate court." One Fox News commentator insists that men won't vote for Hillary Clinton "because she reminds them of their nagging wives." Another pundit jabs the air as he says, "When Hillary Clinton speaks, men hear, 'Take out the garbage!'"

I mentioned the YouTube video at the Women's Center event mostly to acknowledge that they did, indeed, have good reasons to feel under siege but also to inspire them.
The last half of the video celebrates the courage — and the compassion — that Clinton has exhibited throughout her life.

We talked about how "bitch" is really just coward's code for a woman with an opinion and that any guy who called them that should lose the privilege of their company.

"Standing up to guys who are supposed to be your friends is easier said than done," one of the young women said softly. Others nodded.

I told them what I always tell my children: Act brave, and the courage will come.

Afterward, many of the young women came up to me to chat. They were smart and funny as they shared plans for the big lives they had planned. Such a natural resilience, instead of the bluster that my generation of women had to work hard to conjure.

Dietzel vowed that the conversation will continue.

"We talk about the coverage of Hillary Clinton a lot around here," she said. "Even women who support Barack Obama have said it feels like a slap in the face. It becomes almost physical, the reaction to it. Makes you sick in the stomach."

Doesn't do much for our hearts, either.

Connie Schultz is a Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist for The Plain Dealer in Cleveland and the author of two books from Random House: "Life Happens" and "… and His Lovely Wife." To find out more about Connie Schultz (cschultz@plaind.com) and read her past columns, please visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.




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Originally Published on Wednesday May 14, 2008


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